Author Comment

Replies

Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 10:47 AM BoumtjeBoumtje
   You are fucked. Sep 16, 2009 10:49 AM Mean Machine say what
   unless you pull off the biggest Landshark of all time Sep 16, 2009 10:51 AM rebelpimp
   Is there an expiration date on the condom wrapper? Sep 16, 2009 10:52 AM WasteOfChevronsMoney
      I was thinking the same thing about the expiration date. Sep 16, 2009 10:59 AM ridgereb84
         Why would a nurse have condoms randomly fall into their pockets?** Sep 16, 2009 11:03 AM DiamondReb
            Probably after they fucked one of the on-call residents. Sep 16, 2009 11:07 AM Lion O
            I thought it was just the wrapper. Sep 16, 2009 11:08 AM ridgereb84
               Nursing Home Sep 16, 2009 11:09 AM BoumtjeBoumtje
                  Then just tell her you like to wear a condom when you whack off to your prodigious collection Sep 16, 2009 11:15 AM ridgereb84
         If all else fails, you might get a very good friend to take the fall and admit that he was behind it Sep 16, 2009 11:10 AM WasteOfChevronsMoney
   Not saying I doubt your innocence..... Sep 16, 2009 10:53 AM m t flask
      Not saying I doubt him either but that story is plausible Sep 16, 2009 10:56 AM rebelpimp
         I can...it belongs to his wife's boyfriend. Sep 16, 2009 10:59 AM oxfordcircus
            One flaw with that plan: Sep 16, 2009 11:06 AM ridgereb84
               She is better at implementing a proactive plan of deniability Sep 16, 2009 11:10 AM parrotrebA1A
               And that's a fatal flaw. Sep 16, 2009 11:18 AM patdog.sixpackspeak
                  Not if the date on the thing doesn't lend itself to that Sep 16, 2009 1:03 PM SoxFan343
      Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 10:58 AM Fogell
   Looks like new car time to me. Sep 16, 2009 11:00 AM I lost my nutt rag
      Disagree. If you didn't do it, deny, deny, deny. Sep 16, 2009 11:38 AM parrotrebA1A
      Worst advice ever. Sep 16, 2009 3:06 PM Mean Machine say what
   Are you sure your clothes were the only ones in the wash? Sep 16, 2009 11:02 AM Reb92
   Step 1, change your avatar Sep 16, 2009 11:05 AM DiamondReb
   In all seriousness....are you a generally smart guy or a dumbass? Sep 16, 2009 11:08 AM msbelle96
      This is where his porn addiction could help, if she doesn't know about it. Sep 16, 2009 11:16 AM WasteOfChevronsMoney
         She Knows About It Sep 16, 2009 11:18 AM BoumtjeBoumtje
            Damn, then I'd go with blaming her friends, then check the expiration date, if no date, look for a Sep 16, 2009 11:25 AM WasteOfChevronsMoney
            Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 12:31 PM LongGone
      Are these included in those times... Sep 16, 2009 11:27 AM JabbatheGut1
         None of the above..... Sep 16, 2009 11:49 AM msbelle96
            Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 5:14 PM hooch1275
               Crying while watching Braveheart is 100% acceptable..... Sep 16, 2009 5:24 PM msbelle96
         Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 2:49 PM All In Rebel
            But that's not real crying. That's an involuntary tearing. Sep 16, 2009 2:52 PM ridgereb84
      Same thought. Sep 16, 2009 1:53 PM DHAGny Taggart
   Prayers sent Sep 16, 2009 11:10 AM fillmoregandt
      Not A Public Washing Machine Sep 16, 2009 11:13 AM BoumtjeBoumtje
         So much for your story being plausible then. Sep 16, 2009 11:20 AM patdog.sixpackspeak
         Damn, I didn't understand that earlier. Sep 16, 2009 11:27 AM oxfordcircus
         was the load full of your clothes only? Sep 16, 2009 11:31 AM Optimus Prime 4
   were your clothes in the machine? Sep 16, 2009 11:23 AM Optimus Prime 4
   I guess I am different than most of ya'll Sep 16, 2009 11:26 AM SoxFan343
      SoxFan is correct Sep 16, 2009 1:32 PM elmsurfer1
         Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 1:39 PM LongGone
         Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 5:33 PM RT23.sixpackspeak
   Post an appeal in the complex laundry room, something like this: Sep 16, 2009 11:28 AM uscreb
      It's a private dryer though. Similar thing happened to me in college Sep 16, 2009 11:33 AM Optimus Prime 4
   If you truly did not do it then there are only a handfull of... Sep 16, 2009 11:32 AM rebelrouseri
      or tell her it can't be yours, you never wear a rubber when cheating** Sep 16, 2009 11:33 AM Optimus Prime 4
         Damnit I swear I did not read this before my post.* Sep 16, 2009 11:37 AM Ad Wizard
      I think you solved the mystery. Sep 16, 2009 11:36 AM patdog.sixpackspeak
   You are not fucked. She is testing you. She put the wrapper there herself. Sep 16, 2009 11:36 AM Ad Wizard
      Completely antd totally agree with this Sep 16, 2009 3:40 PM BunkiePerkins
      Ding, ding, ding! It's a test. Sep 16, 2009 3:52 PM someonestolemyusernamedamnit
   I don't think you have enough information. Ignore these other idiots. Sep 16, 2009 11:53 AM OxpatchReb
      Which all may be true and is the most likely answer IMO... Sep 16, 2009 1:10 PM Mean Machine say what
   Tell her the truth and stick to it. Sep 16, 2009 11:56 AM bigrebone
      and get pissed off as hell. You have to get mad Sep 16, 2009 1:12 PM Optimus Prime 4
         And as part of your consternation insist that she get a daytime shift somewhere else. Sep 16, 2009 1:19 PM ridgereb84
            Yep. You gotta get her away from the other "men hater" nurses. Sep 16, 2009 4:47 PM bigrebone
   I'm going with the "she put it in the washer herself" crowd. Sep 16, 2009 11:56 AM Rezreb
      I think I'm agreeing with this sentiment too Sep 16, 2009 12:00 PM rebelpimp
      I wouldn't offer the cell phone records, etc. Sep 16, 2009 12:05 PM patdog.sixpackspeak
         A direct confrontation could make things worse Sep 16, 2009 1:01 PM SoxFan343
   Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 12:21 PM OMReb46
   For $1000.00, I will approach you and your wife in the Grove, pretend to Sep 16, 2009 12:43 PM Skink
      Price war. I'll do it for $500. Sep 16, 2009 12:46 PM ridgereb84
      Counter offer: For $750, I'll walk up to your wife and Sep 16, 2009 12:56 PM OxpatchReb
         Why would he pay you $750 when he can get.... Sep 16, 2009 2:16 PM rebelrouseri
            Touche' Sep 16, 2009 2:48 PM OxpatchReb
   I knew a guy in Memphis picked up a girl and got blown on the Sep 16, 2009 12:53 PM jackstefano
      Two Blowjobs In One Night Sep 16, 2009 12:55 PM BoumtjeBoumtje
      That guy is an idiot... Sep 16, 2009 1:00 PM DinkyBalls
   I think I've figured this one out! She's playing YOU: Sep 16, 2009 12:59 PM OleTex98
      Rebelbruiser figured it out first. (Germans, but read anyway.)** Sep 16, 2009 1:00 PM OleTex98
      You know, I've been thinking about everyone saying "it's cheaper than a divorce". Sep 16, 2009 1:02 PM ridgereb84
         Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 1:12 PM olemissbydamn
            Wait..they don't have no-fault divorce in Mississippi? Seriously? Sep 16, 2009 1:17 PM OleTex98
               We do have no-fault divorces in Missisippi, but the law is seriously screwed up. Sep 16, 2009 1:23 PM patdog.sixpackspeak
                  Which means it is not no-fault... Sep 16, 2009 1:25 PM Mean Machine say what
                     "Irreconcilable differences" Sep 16, 2009 1:31 PM parrotrebA1A
                        That is what pat is referring to... Sep 16, 2009 1:37 PM Mean Machine say what
                        Even in states that recognize "imcompatibility" Sep 16, 2009 2:39 PM Drewbacca
            Hell no she is not close to having grounds... Sep 16, 2009 1:18 PM Mean Machine say what
            Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 1:24 PM parrotrebA1A
   Search the trash Sep 16, 2009 1:38 PM DawgBot
   hope she doesn't find candy wrappers Sep 16, 2009 2:05 PM rebelliousb
      If the jimmy hat don't fit! You must acquit! Sep 16, 2009 2:13 PM GrantGannon
         There's a Magnum joke in there somewhere but I'm not gonna do it. Sep 16, 2009 2:35 PM ridgereb84
         Wrong! She'll just think it was his lover's . Sep 16, 2009 3:13 PM rebelliousb
   To me your first mistake was the washing machine theory... Sep 16, 2009 2:29 PM OMlawdog
   I would take a close look at the wrapper... Sep 16, 2009 2:47 PM Ivehadbetter
      I like how you appear to take a stake it this thing... Sep 16, 2009 2:49 PM Mean Machine say what
         An attempt to reach across school lines and build good will... Sep 16, 2009 3:06 PM Ivehadbetter
      this is the kind of thread that makes this board different Sep 16, 2009 3:46 PM Optimus Prime 4
   Sounds like one of those nurse-friends of hers may have slipped one into your laundry Sep 16, 2009 3:12 PM Herschel Krustovski
      That's it! One of the other nurses is a lesbo and she wants his wife for herself. Sep 16, 2009 3:34 PM ridgereb84
   Have you two ever used condoms...is that your brand/style of rubber? Sep 16, 2009 3:44 PM BhamReb
      ^^^^^Paging USCReb, Paging twin cocked, USCReb. ^^^^^ Sep 16, 2009 3:48 PM OxpatchReb
      Agreed, I didnt have much to add Sep 16, 2009 3:49 PM BunkiePerkins
      I Go Bareback Sep 16, 2009 3:52 PM BoumtjeBoumtje
         I say that because I've still got a stash from the pre-birth control days Sep 16, 2009 3:56 PM BhamReb
   From reading this you don't have kids, you live in an apartment... Sep 16, 2009 4:01 PM RockLegendBruceDickinson
      Careful. His Lord and Savior, the good and gentle Tebow will smite you Sep 16, 2009 4:09 PM OxpatchReb
   You are fucked because you are obviously retarded. Sep 16, 2009 4:02 PM TBagger
      Obviously it worked for you** Sep 16, 2009 4:06 PM Thile
         No, my wife was a cheating whore. Sep 16, 2009 4:07 PM TBagger
            yeah, man. I with you. Sep 16, 2009 4:50 PM RebelShark
            What? Sep 16, 2009 5:34 PM Jackdragbean
      Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 4:10 PM BhamReb
         Ha. You do have that one right. Sep 16, 2009 4:13 PM TBagger
   Mostly because I don't want to get left out of this thread... Sep 16, 2009 4:17 PM Seven Year Plan
   Boumtje, just wondering if your wife trusted you while y'all were dating or Sep 16, 2009 4:24 PM Rezreb
   Yes.*** Sep 16, 2009 4:29 PM Lion O
   Deny it till you die man, deny it till you die.* Sep 16, 2009 4:35 PM bonedaddy401
   Id hit it. Sep 16, 2009 4:37 PM HamilReb
   Your options are these...... Sep 16, 2009 4:39 PM RebelShark
   Yo BoumtjeBoumtje Sep 16, 2009 4:51 PM someonestolemyusernamedamnit
      Dammit.....it's just been sitting there all damn day too. Nice. Sep 16, 2009 4:53 PM msbelle96
      ^^^Best post in possibly the best nafoom thread ever Sep 16, 2009 5:07 PM McNulty
      Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 5:15 PM Parade All American
      Beautifully played Sep 16, 2009 5:27 PM fillmoregandt
      Coolz Sep 16, 2009 6:03 PM ColonelJohnSartoris
      Is it possible to have a tie for POTW? Sep 16, 2009 6:07 PM Chance438
      ForThemotherfuckingWin. Sep 16, 2009 6:14 PM DuNing
   Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 4:53 PM rebeljukie44
   awesome thread... Sep 16, 2009 5:11 PM Coach34
   After a day's worth of debate this is my conclusion Sep 16, 2009 5:12 PM rebelpimp
   aye BoumtjeBoumtje, Sep 16, 2009 5:12 PM Parade All American
      Yeah, but he was able to buy off his old lady with a $500,000 diamond Sep 16, 2009 5:15 PM uscreb
   Re: Ask Nafoom: Am I Fucked? Sep 16, 2009 5:50 PM ZEBRAHATER
   she's trying to bait you man .. if in fact the wrapper was not yours Sep 16, 2009 5:52 PM RuffandTumble

Disclaimer: "The administrators of NAFOOM reserve the right to create more rules as more and more stupid people post here. We do this only to protect the integrity of the intelligent conversation we hope you will bring to this board. We at NAFOOM believe that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, and in that regard, we also reserve the right to blatantly rip-off the Six Pack at any time we feel it is necessary. We don't feel they'll mind, but if they do, they should let us know about it, and not you. 99.9% of rumors stated here are not true but for that 0.1%, we are definitely going to gloat about it. Neither this message board nor its rules and regulations are associated with the University of Mississippi or any other Ole Miss sports website. The views and opinions expressed herein are strictly those of the post author. The contents of this page have not been reviewed or approved by Nafoom.com."

Partner of USA TODAY Sports Digital Properties