As we all know from a fine film, "Nobody fucks with The Jesus," except for that godless stretch of real estate and strip malls dangling from our continental body like a turd after taco night.
1) For beginners, a caveat on said hethan commonwealth: How far can I go on my euphoric pro-Gators stance before treading into bandwagon (and worse, conference poligamy) territory? Certainly I wouldn't have been this jazzy if LSU had won the bigg'n, so I can't use the "But it's an SEC team" excuse.
1a) For the record, I really have held Florida as my de facto "If not the Rebs" team. Just want to throw that into your divine decision making process.
2) As supreme creator of all living things thou are certainly not burdened by the contraints - NAY - even the concept of "death." But do you still get human type ailments? In this order, I'm inquiring specifically about: receding hairline, unwanted facial blemishes, poor/dry/splotchy skin, hemmroids.
3) Who dat? Eat me. It's not the feel good story of the year. It's not anything other than a fucking fluke. If, however, it isn't, I'd like to remind you that while Atlanta wasn't as fucking retarded enough to develop UNDER a floodline, it does have a bumper crop of would be refugees/minorities/looters/Spike Lee documentary subjects.
4) Chipotle - slightly pricey, excessively yuppie in its decor and boutique-strip-mall placement, but hands down the best burrito going outside of an authentic Tex joint.
5) Up until that special day of days, I'm going to leave question #5 blank (or at least devoid of an actual question) until your son of sons, he who died for our sins of... sins, actually qualifies and shows up on campus to FINALLY anchor a conference caliber D line.
6) What are dirty dice? Should I be worried? You know who this in regard to. She's a sweet girl, but...
7) Just curious - which major Division 1 power is going to simultaneously bring in two star QBs this year? I'd like to know where we'll picking the bones at next.
Ok seriously, if you can't sleep because your bosses stuck you in the (horribly misnamed) Sleep Inn instead of the Hilton and you're watching local news at odd hours (say, 2am), is Martha Sugalski not the hottest piece of ass going? Good God, she rivals the soft core porn bitches.
I couldn't find a better shot. This really doesn't do the hourglass justice...
9) Boobies. That is all.
10) Is it me, or is the easiest way to win awards just to gather some random ass actors, half of which are a visually appealing minority, stuff them all in some obtuse, wordy drama about oil or terrorism or drug cartels and let fly?
PS - Borat's wife. Fucking hell.